Kenshin Takes A Ride On The JewMobile
by AnImEj3Wkid
Summary: Kenshin is on his way to becoming a rabbi after


Kenshin Takes a Ride on the Jew-Mobile  
  
SAY WHATEVER YOU LIKE ABOUT MY STORY. I DON'T CARE.  
  
INTRODUCTION  
  
Kenshin: Its such a nice afternoon, don't you think so Ross?  
  
Me: Ahhh yes. it is quite good weather. Well in this story I am going to make you a Jew. So I just thought id tell you before I start.  
  
Kenshin: What the f***! Why? Does that mean I have to get circ---  
  
Me: Circumcised? I dunno. Ill think about it. So just shut the hell up and let me write the god damn story.  
  
CHAPTER ONE - Sano. The Holy Rabbi????  
  
It was a sunny day, a good day for doing the laundry. As Kenshin washes the cloths he hears this annoying yet familiar voice.  
  
Kenshin: oro? Who are you? Jesus?  
  
Mysterious Man: No silly.but your close. Its me Sano.  
  
Kenshin: Wow. what are you doing dressed up like that. It isn't Halloween you know. What they hell kind of hat is that anyway, looks like your wearing a rice bowl on your head.  
  
Sano: It's a yamaca (you know that lil round thing you see people wearing when they are walking down the street on a Friday afternoon), thank you very much. Its jewish law to keep your head covered. Its pretty much worthless, but it attracts all the ladies.  
  
Kenshin: Jewish?? Sano you bastard. Why the hell did you convert to that crappy religion. You shoulda stayed Catholic.  
  
A/N: I know I just called my own religion crappy. But hey. im just stating the facts.  
  
Sano: .  
  
Kenshin: ?  
  
Sano: The priest were doing things to me that I didn't like, and I decided to convert. The priest were really old and dirty. They scared me.  
  
Kenshin: I don't blame you. I had to use my sheath to show him what it really feels like to be violated.  
  
Sano: Good for you Kenshin. You know what, I've being thinking. I think you should become a Jew. I can convert you because I have gone through rough Rabbi training.  
  
Kenshin: Nawwwww. its ok Rabbi Sano. Im cool.  
  
Sano: Too cool for a jew?  
  
Kenshin: No. im not implying that.  
  
Sano: Bullshit. Your lucky Rabbi's aren't allowed to rape you.  
  
Kenshin: Does that mean if you weren't a Rabbi that you would ---  
  
Out of no where.  
  
Karou: Huh?!?!? Rape. Kenshin you told him about last nite!  
  
Kenshin: eeeekk! . uh.. I mean, no. I wasn't talking to him about "that".  
  
Karou: *blushes* oh. he..he..  
  
Sano: -_^ Whats wrong with you guys.  
  
*** As you can see, Kenshin and Karou have been doing the dirty. This is not meant to give you images in your head. But it did mine =D. ***  
  
Karou: *whispers to kenshin* Who is that faggot you are talking to baby?  
  
Kenshin: That's Sano!  
  
Karou: ehhhh. *drops on floor*  
  
Sano: *crying* Why does everyone think im gay!  
  
Kenshin: There, there. *pats him on the back really hard* Its just cause you like it up the butt.  
  
Sano runs away, but trips on a rock and sprained his penis.  
  
Sano: ahhhh!!!! Oh my god!!!! F***!!! My dick!!!! Ahhhhhhh!! Someone check if its bleeding!!! Im going to die!!  
  
Everyone else quickly runs away, not wanting to be involved with the spraining the "Sano the Rabbi's penis"  
  
Well. megumi was luckily stopping by to see Kenshin and all the other sex fiends of the Kamyia dojo. As she got close to the dojo she saw a person rolling around screaming that he broke his dick. Megumi could not think of who that would be.  
  
Megumi: Who could that be?  
  
The weird fag looking man starts yelling her name!  
  
Sano: Oh my god!!! Megumi! Please. PLEASE!!!! Come save my penis! It really really hurts.  
  
Megumi: Sano? Why the f*** are you rolling around holding your crotch. Whats with the costume anyway.  
  
Sano: Please check my wang to see if there is anything wrong with it.  
  
Megumi: . . . . *cricket* . . . .  
  
Sano: ahhh common!  
  
Megumi: This will only be a one time thing. And don't. I mean DON'T! get any ideas. Ooo wait. I forgot your gay.  
  
Sano: *gasping* just please. help. me.  
  
Sano passes out after losing all of his energy rolling around and screaming that he hurt his "willy".  
  
*** Yes. I am sorry. This is the end of chapter one. I know it was good so don't be telling me "omg that's such a crazy good, most funniest story of kenshin you've every read". thank you. ***  
  
CHAPTER 2 - PLAY WITH THE PUPPIES  
  
After taping and doing a little stitching, Megumi finally. well somehow fixes Sano's penis.  
  
Megumi: I want you to stay off your. ummm you know what for at least 2 weeks. And one more thing. try not to drink a lot because its going to hurt a lot when you urinate. Just as bad is it hurt when you fell.  
  
Sano: *moaning* I cant feel anything down there. is that normal?!?  
  
Megumi: Uhhh.. yeh. I mean yes its very normal. Just listen to me and youll be able to have anal sex in no time.  
  
Sano: What did you say.?  
  
Megumi: I didn't say anything. your just hearing things cause of all the medication ive given you.  
  
Sano: Whatever.  
  
The door slides open and Kenshin walks in the room with a serious look on his face.  
  
Kenshin: Ahem. Sano I am going to take your place and become a Rabbi.  
  
Sano: No its---  
  
Kenshin: Don't talk. you need to save your energy.  
  
Sano: Fine. ok kenshin. *careless sigh*  
  
Kenshin: Where can I find someone that can teach me the way of the Rabbi.  
  
Sano: Well. ill send you to the person who taught me. Saito Hajime.  
  
Kenshin: What?!?! No way.  
  
*** ahahah! Yeh that's right. Saito is the Master Rabbi. He has taught Sano and many others of the Jewish Alliance. Wow. this is going to be cool ***  
  
Well kenshin decides to leave and head to wherever Saito is going to be teaching him the ways of the jew. Oh, wait, he's probably at a temple. Temples suck.  
  
Kenshin: Damn. I never thought I would see him again. With my luck he'll try to kill me and circumcise me for no reason. That sick fuck.  
  
Lalalalalalalalalaal. 5 min later.  
  
Kenshin: So this is the pleace  
  
*sign* WELCOME TO SAITO'S PLAY WITH THE PUPPIES TEMPLE! Please have a seat and wait for the one and only Rabbi Saito.  
  
Kenshin: *sigh* what the hell...  
  
Kenshin seats down on a very comfortable chair. Which he thinks is quite soft on his butt.  
  
Kenshin: This seat is so damn soft. I wanna take it home.  
  
^voice^: Do not dare take that chair. That would be the 4th one this month.  
  
Kenshin: Ok. that's it.  
  
Saito: Ahhhhh.if it isn't the Battousai. What a pleasant surprise.  
  
*** End of Chapter 2. Sorry, no funny comments. Shut up. ***  
  
CHAPTER 3 -  
  
Kenshin: Hey Saito, whats up buddy? Long time no talk? Heh.  
  
Saito: Have you come here to fight? Or to eat some bagels? Or. or. Why are you here?  
  
Kenshin: I want to become a Rabbi.  
  
Saito: Say again?  
  
Kenshin: You heard me. I want to become a Rabbi. I am here to take Sanos place since he had an accident.  
  
Saito: What kind of accident.  
  
Kenshin: He broke his dick. I don't know how he did it. oh wait. He tripped over a rock. Damn. Im fucking stupid. I could I forget that. Now that was some funny shit. Saito thinks ^now we cant have gay butt sex anymore^  
  
Kenshin: Everything aite, Saito.  
  
Saito: Uhhhh yeh. Well Im going to tell you this once and only once. There is one condition to becoming a Rabbi.  
  
Kenshin: What the fuck is it Saito?!?!?  
  
Saito: You. uhh. you. uh. have to. uh. LET ME CIRCUMCISE YOU!  
  
Kenshin: Dear god! Get me out of this place!  
  
Kenshin starts running out the door until.  
  
Saito: Stop! I was just kidding. relax. relax. It's a joke.  
  
Saito ^dammit!^  
  
Kenshin: Fine fine.but do I have to get circumcised.  
  
Saito: Yes.  
  
Kenshin: Ahhhh what the fuck. Come on.  
  
Saito: Dammit you are going to get circumcised, and that's that. So shut the fuck up before I ra- hurt you!  
  
Kenshin: oro?  
  
Kenshin ^Saito sure is acting weird. if that's the word I want to use^  
  
Kenshin: well then. Fine. As long as I can help Sano!  
  
Saito: Come right this way then.  
  
*** Saito's gay. Haha. Yeh. He's gay. Haha. He takes it up the butt. That homo. Haha. ***  
  
Chapter 4 - OMG! THAT HURTS! 


End file.
